Taji Through The Looking Glass

Only God Gets It Right The First Time Around.

– Stephen King

It often strikes me as odd how fear can control much of our actions in our day to day life. We fear to take risks because of how we might look to other people. We fear the unknown because of its nature, its vast possibilities and its unpredictable qualities. We fear failure and its perceived repercussions.

Very recently I was asked to write a script then voice it. I had done that dozens of times for the company I work for. But this request came from a sister company. They were willing to pay me to write them 2 scripts for a conference.

So why did I hesitate if I can do this with my eyes closed? Why the sudden self doubt? Is it because before I was secure in the confines of getting my salary even if my script wasn’t award winning? or is it just the idea that I will no longer be part of a team… but be representing myself?

Whatever the case was, my need to make some extra cash superseded my self doubt and the scripts were written and recorded and money was made.

Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.

– Winston Churchill

So just like that a new freelance outlet appeared and Taji stepped through the looking glass.

A few days later I remembered that an agency in the Middle East had contacted me and mentioned that they liked how I write. They mentioned that I should contact their script department because they often have need for copywriters in their business.

My fear clouded mind dismissed their compliments as niceties. They were just being nice, they wouldn’t hire me as a writer… who would.

But then when the sister company got it through my thick skull that I can do this professionally, and in truth I have been doing it professionally for years… only it was all for the benefit of one company. I reconsidered their offer.

I contacted their script writing department, got my first assignment, wrote several drafts.

And sold a script.

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain

– Bene Gesserit – Litany against fear – Frank Herbert – Dune


4 Comments


  1. A very worthwhile posting, Taji! Fear and self-doubt can be paralyzing and we must ‘break through’ the glass, as you called it. There is a natural inclination to ‘over estimate’ others while ‘under-estimating’ ourselves. Your recent example is a good reminder to all of us to just put our ‘best foot forward’ and go on!

    (Our thoughts are with you during this difficult time in Egypt.)

    • Thanks Dan,

      The situation in Egypt right now with the Interim military government is, as the Egyptians saying goes, in the palm of a demon (volatile). The economics of it are terrible, the uncertainty of the sustainability of the private sector businesses is causing layoffs left and right as well as deep cuts in salaries.

      Part of the reason that pushed me toward the path less taken was the need to sustain my family by any legal and ethically permissible means necessary. It meant leaving my comfort zone and what a minor sacrifice that was to serve the greater good right?

      One of the reasons the company I work for was able to survive the revolution and its economic repercussions was the fact that my employer maintains business through several international channels. So all our proverbial eggs where not in one basket but spread over several countries.

      Other business were not so lucky. I am trying to follow my employers same business model, diversify my services while maintaining a global clientele.

      sometimes in the midst of a calamity one finds clarity of thought and purpose.
      taji

  2. Taji, you are always ‘articulate’ in your writing. I believe you would do well, professionally, no matter where you choose to live. Diversifying your services is a great idea.

    Best wishes for continued success.

    • I try to put my Journalism Degree to some use… my only wish is to be understood as I have been misunderstood so often 🙂

      and the same wishes of Good success to you too Dan… always!